Unloaded ...

Kid: (knock knock) ... anybody home? ... anybody cares? I need help!

Long: I am quite busy, why don't I touch base with you in a few weeks?

Kid: (nodding, sad) ... will you abandon me again like I was once abandoned?

Long: I will not abandon you, but I am tired! you know ... I am running low in energy and I need to be rejuvenated in order to bring you comforts. 

Kid: I understand, I am a good kid and I will wait for you ... but ... just don't abandon me!

Long: You got my words! I will be back ... wait for me ...

days had gone by ...

weeks had gone by ...

The kid waited ...

Kid: (sobbing) Long ... I need help ... 

Long: (sobbing) Yes, I still remember ... I didn't forget about you ... I am running out of energy too ... I am sorry, I have to admit that there was a moment or two that I wanted to leave you behind just as I did for years, but Our Daddy just reminded me not to leave you alone again ... so I ran back to come to you again ...

Kid: (sobbing) Thank you ...

Long: (Embracing the kid in her arms) I won't leave you like I did before, I will be there even when I have no solutions for you ... for my Lord embraced me in His arms ... 

(Long extended her arms for the little kid)

Kid: (sobbing in Long's arms) Thank you ...

Long: I wished I could have done more ... I offer to you my presence just as how our 天父爸爸held me tight in His arms when I was in desperation ...

Kid: I am very tired ... I am scared ... I am feeling hurt ... 

Long: I hear you ... why don't I take you out for a walk?

Kid: en ... just don't leave me ...

Long: I wont! I promise!

Long took the kid to Jericho Beach where she called that her sacred place ... 

It was a little chilly, the sun blazed its way onto the sandy beach ...

The air was refreshing and layered with a very thin layer of fog in it ...

Long: my dear, let's tell our 天父爸爸 everything ...

Kid: ... will He listen?

Long: Yes!!

On and on, they went on telling Our Lord about every single thoughts and tears ...

God: I heard you both! I am here ... looking up the mountains ... You lift up your eyes to the hills where does your help come from? Your help comes from Me, the Maker of heaven and earth. I will not let your foot slip - I who watch over you will not slumber; indeed, I who watch over Israel will neither slumber nor sleep. I, The Lord, watches over you, I am your shade at your right hand; the sun will not harm you by day, nor the moon by night. I, The Lord, will keep you from all harm - I will watch over your life; I will watch over your coming and going both now and forevermore.

Kid: Are you The Lord that Long told me about?

God: Yes. I have known you for a long time. 

Kid: REALLY? How did you know me?

God: I created you!

Kid: REALLY? Why did you create me?

God: I created you out of my love for you ...

Kid: but ...

God: I knew what you wanted to ask ... do you want to hear my answer?

Kid: en ...

God: I want to lavish my love on you ... you were never a mistake ... I will use your tears to lavish my love and comfort upon those little wounded kids around you. 

Kid: Hey God, you are using BIG words ... but ... I think I understand what you mean ...

God (smiled and knock on the kid's head): Silly! but I DO love you ... I won't leave you ...

Long: Thank you, 天父爸爸！

Long took the kid to pet shop to bookstore to have moments on bonding and comforts. The baby fluffy kitten was so playful ...

As the sun calling it the day, Long received a comforting hug from a buddy with bubble tea in her hands. God is real ... He sent angel over in times of need the most ... 

I squeezed out my last bit of energy for the Jubilization. I broke down literally on my ride home after the late night radio show. Genuine friendships DO walk a long way, thanks for the late-night comforts! We witness how each other struggled and wept for the past 10 years ... and thanks for reminding me that I am actually on the path of recovery. I knew all these by heart, but it was just soothing to hear those words from the mouth of a dear friend. 

The emotionally draining weekend is over finally! ... recuperating from exhaustion ...

Glory In The Thorn - 恩召

This is not only a work-event, but a chance to foster transformation of lives and make people more in tune with God's very own heart. 

For I heard of many stories that have been going through the Jubies' lives during these months of practice, the worship experience was absolutely abundant. One prayer I constantly made whenever I prayed for this team was that the Holy Spirit would melt these melodies and lyrics in the things that each of one have been going through. Each and every of their worshipful soul is beautiful and shinning!! I am just proud of each one of them and I thank God for answering the prayer. 

A lot of things are knocking at my heart ... 

Folks, this is only the beginning of a transforming process. press on ... for God is with us every step of the way! 

Stonegrill

Everyday is a valentine's day when you found someone that you could walk alongside with on both wide and winding roads. With this late dine-out season, valentine's day is good excuse to fill our bellies with good food ... and so we picked Stonegrill. The food was quite good actually, but the conversation was even better :). We are not huge keeners for food (most of the time), eCanteen or public market can basically satisfy us ... but it was a lovely dinner :)

Wii @ NRAC

WOOHOO ... Wii invaded my church! haha ... Last night, a huge congregation from more than 10 fellowship from my church came out to witness our church-wide Wii Tennis tournament as our Chinese New Year Celebration in our Sanctuary. (Basically, you'd think that it's Christmas worship when you walked into the sanctuary packed with people) It was such a fun time spending together with brothers and sisters I know and with those who just newly met!! We were screaming and cheering for each other. There were Uncles and aunties playing against those from Awana, youth fellowships playing against career fellowships ... and should you think uncles and aunties were clumsy in playing those Wii Sports ... WOW ... you'd be amazed! Hahaha .... now I know how 「入屋」Wii really is!! We were screaming from our lungs during those match point games. 

We just had enough time to go through the 1st round of matches ... and that we will have to wait for another chance to play the second round!!!

I basically lost my voice when I got to the radio station last night ... phewww ...

Psalm 63

As I am preparing for leading a few songs in fellowship this week, I came across this song and psalm. I long for some down time to spend with my Lord ... I do thirst for Him, I do long for Him ...

This became my prayer ...

Psalm 63

O God, you are my God, (yes, You are my God and ONLY you are my God)

earnestly I seek you

my soul thirst for you,

my body longs for you, 

in a dry and weary land

where there is no water. 

I have seen you in the sanctuary and beheld your power and your glory.

Because your love is better than life, my lips will glorify you.

I will praise you as long as I live,

and in your name I will lift up my hands.

My soul will be satisfy as with the richest of foods;

with singing lips my mouth will praise you.

On my bed I remember you; I think of you through the watches of the night. 

Because you are my help, I sing in the shadow of your wings.

My soul clings to you; your right hand upholds me. 

They who seek my life will be destroyed; they will go down to the depths of the earth.

They will be given over to the sword and become food for jackals.

But the kind will rejoice in God; all who swear by God's name will praise him, while the mouth of liars will be silenced. 

As I shared with my team at work this week, I feel 'awkward' when I was sitting at my desk at home and was starting on my paper once again. For the past 2 years, unexpected events and news jolted my life and threw the norm of my life's tranquility into a roaring stormy sea for 2 years. That awkwardness told me that tranquility is scarce and rather precious. I am used to be in crisis/survival mode than back to life's serenity. It was that serenity that brought me to Psalm 63. I long to cling onto God in my serenity as much as when I was in desperation. And indeed, those moments of desperation wove into the fabric of my life and made my journey with God stronger than ever. 

Joyfully Ken and I prayed tonight after our 'tuen nin' dinner ... we promised that we won't leave Him and that we continuously offer our lives to Him as a loving response for Him unfailing love for us. Lord, hear our prayers ...